


Of Paparazzi and Succulents

by botanistlester (Skeletonflowers)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Actors, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Anxiety Attacks, Denial, Florists, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Phan Fluff, Phanfiction, Plantboy Phil, famous!dan, florist phil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-16
Updated: 2016-06-16
Packaged: 2018-07-15 12:08:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7221727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skeletonflowers/pseuds/botanistlester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Actor!Dan is running away from a mob of fans when he runs into a flower shop. There, he meets a quirky florist who has an absurd liking towards succulents, seeming to think they have feelings of their own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Paparazzi and Succulents

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much to my betas, humhallephan and moondaniel for nitpicking this piece! Hope you all enjoy c:

Dan knew it was a bad idea to go outside. He knew exactly what would happen when he went out (he could hear the squeals and screams even now), but he did it anyways. All he wanted to do was to go to store to grab some more dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets, but of course, he couldn't enjoy the everyday luxury of going out to the store.

As soon as he stepped out of his flat, a hush fell over the street and he sucked his breath in, waiting to see what would happen. Then, not even two minutes later, he was being pushed, screamed at, and had sobbing girls crying into his shoulder.

And all he had wanted was some damned dinosaur nuggets.

“You looked so good in your latest movie, Dan!!!”

“Please take a photo with me!”

“I want to have your babies!!”

Dan mentally grimaced at the last one, but kept the smile glued on his face no matter, his famous trademark smirk that made all of the girls (and boys) swoon and various ovaries explode. He took a few pictures with people, his tummy begging him to go get the dino nuggets that are waiting for him at the store.

Dan knew should have just ordered them to his house like he normally did, but he just wanted to be a regular person for once. Apparently, that wasn’t possible.

“Alright guys!” He called over the crowd of people. It didn’t really do much in terms of calming them down so he began to edge away as unnoticeably as possible. “I’m sorry, but I have to get going, I have some places to be.”

They, of course, didn’t listen, they never did, so it wasn’t really a surprise when Dan began sprinting, trying to get away as camera flashes and footsteps followed closely behind him.

Don’t get him wrong, Dan absolutely loved this life, loved being able to star in various films, and loved acknowledged for his acting talent. But the paparazzi and the lack of privacy got to him sometimes. Like now, when all he really wanted was to get his nuggets and eat them like there was no tomorrow. It was worth it though, especially when he was able to act and put on a show for his audience. He loved his fans dearly and would do anything for them considering they were people who encouraged him to follow his dreams and the reason he has such a good life now.

He turned a corner. His breath was coming out in huge pants due to lack of exercise, his chest constricting painfully. It reminded him just how badly he needed to go to the gym, and how his membership is maybe eleven months expired, but he tried not to focus on that now, ducking into a nearby shop to hide from the group of people chasing him.

The shop was warm, but he didn’t pay any mind to which kind of store it was, instead, he clambered behind a shelf where he would be able to watch out the window, making sure nobody had noticed him come in here. His hurried pace made something knock off the shelf, but he duly noted the shattering noise, opting to sigh in relief at his successful escape. He could pay for it later, anyways.

There wasn’t much time to relax, however, when a scream interrupted his peace sounding rather hysterical and pissed off. “SUSAN!”

Dan jumped, whirring around to stare in bewilderment at the man who had let out such a noise. The man (who looked on the verge of tears with a flushed face) had wide blue eyes and a black fringe that was pushed back by a trembling hand. He had on a light green button up with a few spots of dirt on it and light blue skinny jeans that were rolled up at the bottom to show laced black boots.

“Excuse me?” Dan squeaked out, getting over his initial scare. He straightened himself up, brushing off his Yeezy jumper.

“You killed Susan!” The man proclaimed, gesturing wildly to the ground. It was then that Dan glanced down to gape at the smashed pot by his feet, a medium-sized succulent strewn across the floor.

“Susan?”

“The plant, you idiot!” He gave Dan a cold glare as he dropped to the ground, trying to sweep up some of the dirt into his hands. It didn’t really do much, especially since he didn’t have anywhere to put it thanks to the broken pot, but it didn’t stop him from gathering as much soil and succulent as he possibly could. “I hope you’re happy with yourself, you plant murderer.”

The only thing Dan could do was gape at the man. He didn’t quite know how to respond to that. Besides, it’s not like he meant to ‘murder’ this guy's’ plant. “Well, it wasn’t much of a murder as it is a manslaughter.”

“A plantslaughter!” The man replied in an instant. He giggled, covering his mouth as he did so and Dan couldn’t help but to laugh along at the lame pun. “Why were you in such a hurry, anyways?” Plant Boy asked once they calmed down, standing up to put the remainders of the crime into another pot. Looking around, Dan noted the various different plants lining the shelves and realized he had ventured into a flower shop.

It was one thing to call Dan a plantslaughterer, but it also seemed as if Plant Boy had no idea who Dan even was, making him go into a deeper stage of shock. “Erm. I was being chased?” The statement turned into more of a question and Plant Boy almost dropped his plant.

“Chased? Do you need me to call the police? Because I will, even if you did kill Susan.”

Dan shook his head. “No, no. The police can’t really do anything about it. I, er, I’m famous?”

The man’s eyes grew wide, even wider than before, as he stared blankly at Dan. His eyes traveled all over Dan’s posture, taking in the brown fringe and almond eyes, the tan Yeezy jumper, and the black skinny jeans with zipper shoes. “I don’t recognize you,” he said bluntly. “You don’t look like someone famous.”

“How does someone look famous?” Dan asked in exasperation. “Come on, you had to have seen me before. I was in The Galaxy Explorer.”

“Never seen it.”

“Until the Morning Comes?”

“Nope.”

“Dystopia? Come on, you had to have seen at least one movie I’ve been in.” Dan didn’t know why he was so bothered by this. Normally he would have been pleased to be unknown to someone, but there was a churning in his gut when Plant Boy just rolled his eyes.

“Are you normally this much of an arse when people don’t recognize you?” Plant Boy’s expression changed suddenly and he smiled, his nose crinkling and his eyes turning alight with laughter. “I just don’t watch movies much, so it’s not an insult towards you. I’d rather sit down with a good book and a cup of tea than to busy myself with movies that could be better read than seen.”

Dan blinked. It seemed as if he was always at a loss of words around this guy. “Right. Well, I’m Dan Howell in case you ever want to look me up or something.” He internally cringed at how desperate he sounded. He really should just shut up and leave immediately. “Um, I should be going now, though. Seems like they’ve finally left me alone.”

Plant Boy nodded in understanding. He pursed his lips, tapping his chin before turning around and rifling through one of the shelves. When he faced Dan once more, he was holding a very small cactus, one that could fit in Dan’s palm that had a pretty pink flower growing on the top. “Take Padme as an apology for not knowing who you are.”

Dan took the cactus, furrowing his eyebrows. “Shouldn’t I be the one owing you an apology? For smashing your succulent?”

“Susan,” Plant Boy corrected. “It’s alright. I’ll just have to hold a funeral for her later.”

“Right. Thanks then, and sorry for the mess.” Dan backed out of the shop, the tiny cactus held in his palm and his jumper covering his face so he could get back home safely.

He was still slightly confused on his walk back. He didn’t know why it bothered him so much when Plant Boy didn’t recognize him, or why the man had given him a cactus in apology for it. Most of all, he was confused why the man seemed to have names for all of his plants. Why did he do that? There wasn’t really a point in it that Dan could see, but it was definitely a bit too endearing.

Dan didn’t even realize until he got home that he forgot to buy his dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets.

-

Dan didn’t even try to question how he showed up inside the flower shop again. It just happened, a magnet to metal and whirring thoughts about how there was a person on this planet who didn’t know who he was. He couldn’t seem to get it out of his mind no matter how much he tried to.

Besides, he figured he should at least pay back the Plant Boy for the killing of Susan, or whatever he called that godawful succulent. He ended up buying some peonies that were planted in a cute (and very pastel lavender) cat-shaped pot. He figured it was a perfect present for someone who liked plants so much.

He made sure to dress appropriately this time, thanking the lord that it was beginning to get cold enough to wear a scarf. His Gryffindor scarf, a gray beanie, and a pair of sunglasses were enough to hide his trademarked identity this time around. The peonies were tucked in the crook of his arm, safe from the ground and the cold hard pavement.

As he got closed to the shop, Dan was able to actually survey it, noting the little flowers drawn on the windows and the pretty green sign that read ‘Thistle Do Nicely’. Not a very intriguing name in Dan’s opinion, but he couldn't be bothered to call it out.

And just as he thought he was safe, safe from the paparazzi and the wondering eyes, a voice called out his name and Dan high-tailed it into the shop. He could only hope they wouldn’t come in here after him, and if they did, he hoped they wouldn’t linger.

The smell of flowers greeted him, a sweet and pleasant scent. He stumbled a bit from the force of running inside, hip knocking into one of the shelves.

“No, no, no, no,” Dan muttered as he watched a pot start to tip. His hands flew out, an attempt to steady it, but a large crash rung throughout the room before he could correct it.

He winced, preparing himself.

And just on cue, a voice screamed, “SUSAN TWO!”

Dan turned, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. “Susan two?” He asked. The bewilderment from yesterday seemed to have stuck, he felt as awkward as ever.

Plant Boy froze before his expression turned sour. “You again!” He exclaimed. “How many plants do you plan on cold heartedly murdering?!”

“Okay, that was an accident. But Susan Two? Really?”

“Well, you killed off the first one, I had to have a descendent.”

“Right,” Dan huffed. He pursed his lips. Maybe coming back was a bad idea.

But then Plant Boy was directing his attention to the peonies in his arms and his expression turned to one of surprise. “You brought me flowers?” He asked. There was a pretty pink that spread across his face, one that resembled the flowers in Dan’s hands.

“Ah- yeah. As an apology for killing Susan.” Dan paused, looking down at the spilled soil sheepishly. “And Susan Two.”

Plant Boy grinned, a smile that completely lit up the room. He took the pot with gentle fingers, smiling down at them as if they were precious children. “Peonies,” he said softly. His eyes were soft like raindrops on green leaves. “The symbolism of romance and the omen of good fortune and a happy marriage.” He turned his face to Dan, a humorous expression present on his face. “Are you wishing us a happy marriage, Dan?”

Dan sputtered. His face had gone completely red and he was seriously rethinking the flower thing. “Of course not! Why would I want to marry you if I don’t even know your name?!”

“If you knew my name was Phil, would that change your mind then?”

“No!”

Phil laughed then, a full-on giggle with his fingers covering his mouth. “I’m just teasing you,” he said, placing the peonies by some miniature roses and an aloe plant. “Thank you, I like them a lot.”

Dan, careful not to knock over any more of Phil’s possessions, leaned against the wall. “Are you going to name it, then?”

Nodding, Phil brushed his fingers over the petals. His face was so gentle like that, it was obvious that he cared greatly about his plants. Perhaps they were the thing he cared for the most even, especially with an expression like that. “Her name is Myrna! Such pretty flowers deserve such a beautiful name. It fits her, doesn’t it?”

Dan furrowed his eyebrows, but he couldn’t help to be in awe by the man before him. He couldn’t believe someone could be so caring about plants, an object that could do nothing to show their love back. “Such a strange person,” Dan muttered under his breath.

“Oh, Dan,” Phil said suddenly. He didn’t turn his attention away from the peonies, speaking to him while he rearranged the shelf to look more homey towards the newcomers. “I watched The Galaxy Explorer last night.”

“Yeah? What did you think?”

“I’ve seen better,” Phil chimed happily. Dan’s mouth fell open. Is this guy kidding me right now? “Your acting was wonderful, of course. I didn’t expect any less from you, and your looks certainly played the part of a man exploring and finding different life on other planets. But I have to say that while your acting was good, it didn’t seem like your heart was into it. It seemed fake almost, which is ironic because it is, but it almost seemed as if you were just going through the motions without putting your heart into it.”

Dan open and closed his mouth a few times, words dying in his throat. He probably looked like a fish gasping for air, lucky that Phil hadn’t glanced at him once. “Is… Is that so?” He got out eventually, voice choked, constricted.

Only now did Phil look at him. His face was completely serious and Dan had trouble maintaining eye contact, instead keeping his eyes glued to the white button up Phil was adorning. Upon closer inspection, he noticed little cacti printed on the shirt and he didn’t know what else he’d expected. “If you love something, you should put your entire heart into it. It should make you feel like you’re on top of the world when you do it and it should never feel like it’s crushing you or holding you down. I can tell just by looking at you that acting is something you love to do, so why not enjoy it to your full extent?” He turned to a shelf of lilies, smiling as he stroked the white petals. “The things you love should make you feel free, not make you unable to breathe.”

Speaking of being unable to breathe, it was happening to Dan right now. His head was spinning and his throat was constricted and he just needed to think for a moment. He looked out the window, biting his lip and trying to figure out his next course of action. “I do love acting,” he muttered, but it felt like a lie on his tongue when gauging what Phil had said.

“I’m sorry, I have to get going. I have to buy some dinosaur nuggets.” Dan said impulsively, wanting to get out of the situation immediately.

When he left, the bell jingled on the door and it sounded a bit like Phil’s laughter. He wondered why he always ran away when he didn’t know what to say.

Not to mention why he keeps forgetting his dinosaur nuggets.

-

When Dan saw his face in the news the next day, he literally almost shat his pants.

He was just mindlessly watching some random channel on the television with his cat, Sir Butts. He could barely hear the sound of the TV over the loud crunching of his cereal and the mewling of Sir Butts when he tried to bat the spoon out of his hand.

A news anchor was just chatting it up about the new movie Dan starred in (this being The Galaxy Explorer) when they started bringing up his personal life. This was no where near new, thanks to the idiotic paparazzi who thought they knew everything about him, but it always seemed to irk him when they brought up Dan’s relationship status. Obviously relationships weren’t exactly the number one worry in his life right now, and more so the fact that he had just signed a contract to do a film adaption of the book Once Upon a Marigold.

(Nobody needed to know how much he squealed when he got the call saying he’d been casted as the main character, Christian, or that he had danced around with Sir Butts to Smash Mouth for an hour afterwards. It was an even bigger shock when Jennifer Lawrence had gotten cast as Marigold. Yeah, Dan may have sobbed a little at that one.)

“Speculators try to understand why Dan Howell hasn’t been in a relationship in over two years, but have come up virtuously empty handed despite a few theories springing forth,” the news lady said monotonously. Dan rolled his eyes. Right, the theories. “One theory seems to be brought to light yesterday after Howell was seen entering a flower shop with a pot of peonies. The flowers seem to symbolize an omen for a happy marriage making us all wonder; does Dan Howell have a secret relationship with a lowly florist? Stay tuned to find out.”

What?

Dan choked on his cereal, spilling a slosh of milk and cereal onto Sir Butts, who growled and jumped to the floor. This was why Dan hated paparazzi so much. And going outside.

He hadn’t really planned on going back to the flower shop, especially considering he’d broken something each time he’s been in, but now he almost felt an unquenchable desire to go and apologize. Dan couldn’t even imagine what Phil must be feeling at the moment. Freaked out, probably. A bit disgusted at the world, the shipping. He must be on some level of furious since Dan’s gone and fucked everything up again.

But then Dan has to take into account the fact that fans might see him in the shop. Was he willing to risk that, knowing there’s be rumours?

Well, he could just put a bit more of a disguise on than last time.

The television droned on in the background, the reporter going on about more idiotic rumours and how Dan was definitely gay and going for some cute florist dude. Well, she’d gotten at least one part right, but she didn’t need to know that. The other aspect was just ridiculous. Who cares if Dan hadn’t been on a proper date in years? He doesn’t, and nobody else should be butting in on it either.

He was quick to change into his disguise: a blond wig, a High School Musical jersey nobody had ever seen him in, and white high tops that he’d bought just the other day. Top it up with a thin jacket, scarf, and some nice sunglasses, and nobody would ever recognize him!

Or he hoped so, at least. The paparazzi was pretty ruthless when it came down to these things.

Sir Butts waved him off with a low growl, unforgiving since the milk incident, but Dan just pat him on the head and waltzed out the door. The television was still blaring through his mind, making him cringe with the knowledge that everyone was analyzing his relationship at the moment. His relationship with Phil, of all people.

The shop was buzzing with energy this time around. There were people all over the place and two new employees that Dan had never seen before, a soft-looking woman with blonde and pink hair and a tall lad with brunet curls and forest green eyes. They were smiling at each person as they asked about different sorts of flowers, but the smiles seemed strained and a bit too stressed out. Of course, that wouldn’t necessarily be too obvious to anyone who didn’t have an acting career.

Dan had a moment of panic that Phil wasn’t there and that he had risked this trip for nothing, but then he saw a head of black hair and warm blue eyes talking to somebody concerning the different types of roses.

Dan cleared his throat before walking up to him. So far, so good. Nobody had recognized him and he was a good enough actor to pull some sort of accent to differentiate his own voice. What he didn’t really expect was for an American accent to come out, but he supposed it was better than nothing at this point.

“Excuse me,” Dan droned in his newly acquired accent. Phil’s gaze snapped to his, looking confused (the customer Phil was helping looked mildly pissed at the interruption) before realization dawned on his features. “Are there anymore mini pots in the back? I couldn’t seem to find any.” A lie, but Dan hoped Phil got the point.

Phil nodded, giving his customer an apologetic smile. “Give me one minute,” he said to Dan. “I need to ring up this woman’s roses and I’ll be right with you.”

Dan droned out an affirmative ‘okay’ before stepping back and giving them space. He glanced over the store once more, feeling a bit guilty. It was obviously his fault that the flower shop had a huge influx in business. Before, it was just a nice and quiet place that the flowers could sleep in, and now it was a never ending stream of customers, hoping to get a glance of Dan Howell sneaking in to see his nonexistent boyfriend.

Dan felt nauseous.

“Excuse me, sir.” Dan turned to see Phil with a curious grin on his face. “I can take you to the back to find you some mini pots now.”

Dan nodded dumbly and followed him through the throng of people. He couldn’t help but notice what he was wearing today, a white shirt under a pair of light blue overalls and the infamous black boots Dan had seen him in since the first day this whole dramatic episode had started. When they came to the back room (a small area with bags upon bags of soil and fertilizer), Dan noted that Phil’s overalls had a small sunflower patch sewn onto the breast. It suited him.

“Dan?” Phil asked incredulously. His voice was low, quiet so that nobody could possibly overhear. “What in heaven's name are you doing here? And dressed like a bad Troy Bolton at that?”

Itching his neck where the wig was settling uncomfortably against his skin, Dan could feel his skin start to heat up. “I wanted to apologize again, I suppose.”

“Oh god please tell me you didn’t murder Susan Three.”

Dan stared at him. “Um, no. I wanted to apologize for the entire universe thinking we’re dating.”

Phil rolled his eyes. He stuck his hip out and put a slender palm to rest over it. “That’s it?”

“What do you mean ‘that’s it’?!”

Phil chuckled, pressing his fingers over his mouth to hide his smile. His eyes were shining, a bit duller in the dim lighting of the room, but still there anyways. “Haven’t you learned by now that I don’t really mind what the news is saying? They can talk how they want. It doesn’t really affect me directly. Besides, we both know it’s not true so it shouldn’t matter anyway.”

Dan was staring before but now he was full on gaping, jaw slack as he took in the light hearted expression adorning Phil’s face. “But your store is packed tight because of me. And people think you and I are together. It could affect your future relationships!”

“Well, then I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. As for my store, you brought me business when I thought I was going to have to shut down. Why would I be upset about that? To see all of these people so excited over flowers is like a dream of mine.” He looked at Dan through his eyelashes, a small smile still on his lips. “I should be thanking you.”

Dan opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Phil was staring at him with an expectant smile on his face, one that was calm and not upset at all despite the swarm of people in his store. “You’re thanking me even though I smashed your plants?” Dan asked in a rush. He was gaping and probably didn’t mean to say that, but he couldn’t really bring himself to care at this point.

“I mean you reimbursed me, didn’t you? With the peonies, I mean. Unless you go around smashing my plants on purpose, I don’t really have anything against you.” A light shade of pink had come across Phil’s cheeks, something that seemed to happen to him often. “You’re a really good guy, Dan. I can see why everyone likes you so much.”

“Come to coffee with me.” Dan blinked, his mouth gaping at the realization of what came out of his own mouth. He hadn’t originally had any thought about it beforehand, any certainty that he even wanted to start hanging out with Phil, but obviously his vocal cords had other ideas. “Er, I mean if you want to?”

Phil let out a surprised laugh, his eyebrows shooting into his hairline. He raised a hand, one slightly darkened with dirt, and pushed his fringe back. It left a smudge on his forehead but Dan only smiled and lifted his thumb to wipe it off. It made Phil’s face turn fifty shades of red and Dan took some sort of pride in making Phil so flustered. “Won’t the fans see you out with me? We would get flocked.”

And just like that, Dan could feel his excitement deflating. His eyebrows furrowed, contemplating. It was dangerous what he was even considering, but looking at Phil with his bright blue eyes and crooked smile made him relax. “I suppose you’re right. Then come over to mine and let me make you dinner or something. I promise I’ll make it worth your while.” He added a cheeky wink at the end, revelling in the way Phil giggled, covering his mouth with his hand.

“I guess I’ll let you cook me dinner,” Phil teased. “Although I’m busy tonight, so could we possibly do it tomorrow?”

Dan agreed, a grin on his face and a hop to his step. He bid farewell to Phil and traipsed out of the shop, nearly forgetting that he was still wearing his wig and trying to pretend he wasn’t Dan Howell. He didn’t know if it worked or not, but he was happy and he definitely hadn’t been this excited about something since he’s first gotten the call that he’d made it into a movie.

-

Dan had been frantically running around his flat for the past thirty minutes like a chicken with it’s head cut off.

It’s not as if he had anything to worry about, really. He had made sure his place was in tip top shape, even going so far as to groom Sir Butts and put a little blue bowtie around his neck. (For ten minutes afterwards, he had admired his handiwork and how the blue contrasted so much with Sir Butt’s orange and white fur and how his face looked particularly flat that day, showing off his Persian background). The place was spotless, just like Dan’s attire of his button-up moth shirt and black skinny jeans, and the stir fry was sizzling deliciously in the pan.

So why the hell was he so jittery?

He could practically feel Padme the cactus glowering at him from where she sat on his kitchen counter, tsking at the way Dan was pacing back and forth. Was he really that nervous about Phil coming over for dinner? It was just Phil, some dorky guy who liked plants too much and was genuinely upset whenever they died. It’s not like it was Jennifer Lawrence or anybody of huge importance.

Just Phil. But even Just Phil made Dan want to puke. He couldn’t help but wonder if he was making the right decision, having a random guy come over to his house. What if Phil told the public where he lived? What if Phil was actually a huge fangirl and had a blog about him?

Dan shook his head, he was being paranoid. Sir Butts hissed at him as he accidentally stepped on the poor cat’s tail. Phil wouldn’t do that, he wasn’t that type of person.

Right?

Dan thankfully didn’t have time to think about it, though, or else he probably would have cancelled the entire thing and moved to Africa. There was the noise of the buzzer going off - a strange occurrence in itself as there was never a visitor in Dan’s home - before Dan was greeting Phil at the door with an overly large smile.

“Welcome to the Howell residence,” Dan said elegantly, moving to the side to allow Phil through the threshold.

Phil chuckled and glanced around, intrigued. There was a small plant in his hands and Dan almost groaned aloud at the realization that it was a venus fly trap. “I like your place,” Phil said. He turned to Dan with a large grin, shoving the plant into his hands. “I brought Susan Four as a housewarming gift, a thanks for letting me over.”

Dan snorted. “What happened to Susan Three?”

“She’s still intact in my shop! I thought we could both have Susans to keep us company.” When Phil was looking so hopeful like that, Dan couldn’t really say no. He ended up placing Susan Four next to Padme before serving the stir fry onto two plates.

Despite Dan’s overall nerves about Phil being there, he found that dinner was quite enjoyable. Phil was ranting about how popular his shop had gotten after the news had unveiled them as secret lovers and Dan found himself talking about the newest movie he’d been cast in.

“You’re seriously going to be able to kiss Jennifer Lawrence?” Phil gaped, dropping his fork onto his plate with a loud clang. “Not to mention that you’re the star of my favourite book-to-film adaption?” He held a hand to his forehead, making a show to wave himself as if he was overheated. “I think I’m going to faint.”

Dan snorted. “It’s not that big of a deal,” he said nonchalantly. The charade was obviously a lie though, considering his own actions when he was cast. “I kiss big stars all the time.”

“But Jennifer Lawrence?!”

“Okay, maybe not J-Law but-.”

“If you keep up the whole nonchalant act, I’m seriously going to murder you.” Phil’s face was completely serious, eyes wide when he picked up his fork to shove a piece of chicken into his mouth. He pushed his glasses further up his nose and narrowed his eyes at Dan, surveying him. “I have to say, they did pick a pretty good person to play as Christian. I could definitely imagine you making big heart eyes at somebody through a telescope like a big nerd.”

Dan glared and kicked Phil under the table. He managed to also kick Sir Butts in the process and apologized to his cat under his breath while Dan and Phil began to engage in a full-on kicking war. “So by saying I make a good Christian, you’re basically saying I look like a servant?”

“I mean you did cook me dinner.” Dan made sure to make his kick extra hard that time (Sir Butts had already run away), but Phil barely flinched. He smiled wider at that. “In all seriousness, I’ll definitely be the first person to watch the movie.”

Despite the lie, Dan couldn’t help but to feel his face heat up. He took a bite of his stir fry to cover it up, smiling warmly. The dinner was definitely going much better than he’d originally thought.

After finishing supper, they sat down to play a game of Mario Kart, which Dan absolutely slaughtered Phil at. He didn’t understand how someone could be so terrible at the game, but he tried not to make fun of Phil. Too much, at least.

When Phil was leaving the flat with a grin and ruffled hair from running his hands through it, Dan found himself inviting Phil over once more. His heart fluttered in his chest as Phil agreed but he tried to hammer it down, to silence it the best he could.

Famous people aren’t supposed to fall for quirky florists, especially ones with bright blue eyes and crooked smiles that put sunflowers to shame.

-

“So, the news,” Zoe started. The brush applying makeup to Dan’s face was tickling his nose as he breathed in a groan. He knew she would bring it up, Zoe always did whenever something like this happened. “I was expecting news about how you and JLaw were apparently a thing, but a florist? Really? That’s a new one.”

Dan glared at her as much as he could before he had to close his eyes while she contoured his face, making him look presentable and hiding the bags from under his eyes. “My personal relationships have nothing to do with any of you, specifically not the media,” Dan muttered. “Especially when there’s nothing going on anyways.”

“‘Nothing going on,’” she quoted. “Exactly why you brought him peonies. How much gayer can you get?”

“Hey, at least I didn’t have his cock in my ass. That’d be pretty gay if you ask me.”

With his eyes still closed, he wasn’t able to avoid the heavy slap of plastic hitting against his arm. “Hey!” He yelled, jolting and opening his eyes to a pretty flushed Zoella and an eyeful of powder.

“Language!” Zoe snapped, shaking her head. She began to do his makeup again, humming thoughtfully. “You brought the guy flowers, though? What’d you do, murder his dog?”

Dan laughed. “Close. I murdered two of his plants.”

“So you brought him another plant.”

“Yes.”

“A total stranger.”

“Yes.”

“You sure you’re not seeing the guy?”

Dan groaned once more and tried not to smack the makeup brushes out of Zoella’s hands. “I promise we aren’t seeing each other. We’re just friends.”

“Friends?” Zoella pried. He could imagine the way her lips were pursed, perfectly shaped eyebrow twinged upward.

“We have dinner together occasionally and have been texting. We’re friends.” Dan’s voice was firm, strong, not letting her believe that they were anything but.

He opened his eyes when she told him to and her blue eyes seemed a bit sad when she patted his cheek. “Oh, Daniel,” she sighed. “You’ve got Jennifer Lawrence in front of you but you’re still pining after a flower boy.”

Dan didn’t comment on that. But he did complement Jennifer Lawrence when she walked into the room wearing a ruffled blue dress that pooled at her feet and made her look relatively out of place in her own skin. Just how the books portrayed her character, Princess Marigold. Dan didn’t think they could have done better with the casting on this one, but he could also be a little biased.

“Looking pretty awkward, but still beautiful as always,” Dan complemented, throwing Jennifer a large smile. He threw a cheeky wink in there as well, just so she knew he was joking.

“Looking like a servant, but somehow still dashing,” Jennifer shot back. Dan blushed and laughed aloud. He felt like he was going to faint whenever he even interacted with her, but he tried to hide it to the best of his ability.

“Wanna take a teaser selfie for the fans?” Dan asked. When she agreed, he fumbled with his phone and tried to hide the way he was sweating when she leaned into him to take the picture. Dan didn’t look nervous at all in the photo, his signature smirk on his face while Jennifer glowed beside him.

He uploaded the picture to instagram, twitter, and tumblr with the caption, ‘Everybody has to be a servant for Princess Jennifer at least once in their lives.’ In minutes, it had gotten thousands of likes and he had gotten a text message, phone ringing loudly in his hand.

Jennifer looked curious as he opened it, smiling widely when he noticed it was from Phil.

From: Phil

You make a gorgeous servant, how many times did you faint before taking that picture?

To: Phil

A good five times but don’t tell her that.

Dan couldn’t stop smiling until they began filming, Zoella staring at him knowingly.

The story of Once Upon a Marigold was rather simple. It was about a boy named Christian who had run away from home when he was little and had been taken in by a forest troll named Ed. As he grew up, Christian enjoyed to look across the river at the castle through his telescope, where he saw a beautiful princess that nobody else seemed to like. Enamoured with her, he began to send mail to her through his pet pigeons and eventually became good friends with her despite the princess not knowing his identity. He then got a job in the castle as a servant to be closer to her, but still didn’t tell who he was. It was later revealed that people avoided Princess Marigold because she was cursed, being able to read the thoughts of anybody who touched her.

They had begun to film the part of the book where Princess Marigold was at dinner with her suitors, Prince Cyprian and Sir Magnus. Prince Cyprian was played by Evan Peters (Dan nearly fainted once more) while Sir Magnus was actually Sam Claflin.

Dan was playing the perfect servant, observing from where he was perched by the wine table while Marigold walked into the room followed by her three tiny dogs. Dan pretended to look her up and down, from the bored expression on her face to the frilly Prussian blue gown that definitely made her seem out of place. He had to hand it to the costume makers, they definitely outdid themselves in making ‘Marigold’ look rather uncomfortable in the flashy style.

He tried not to pay attention to the cameras as he did his job, filling up the guest’s wine glasses while Prince Cyprian began to slip meat under the table for the dogs, making it obvious that Marigold saw him doing so. Sir Magnus refused to even look at the dogs and was staring at the silverware by his plate with a perplexed frown before picking up a fork with uncertainty. Dan had to give it to Sam - he was doing an excellent job seeming confused and nervous.

Then it happened: Prince Cyprian dropped a piece of meat onto Sir Magnus’s shoe. On perfect cue, one of Marigold’s dogs bit into his foot and (they made sure to cut the scene and replace the dog with a realistic looking stuffed one) Magnus kicked the creature across the dining hall.

Marigold screamed and jumped to her feet while there was a series of yelling at the startled Sir Magnus.

Just like previously practiced, Dan rushed to the dog and picked it up just before Marigold, flushing at their sudden close proximity. He handed the dog over to her and the camera panned down at their hands touching beneath the dog’s body as their eyes met.

“Oh my,” Princess Marigold whispered. It was obvious to the audience what happened, that Marigold had just read what Dan was thinking. She turned, cradling the dog, Topsy, before fleeing the scene. The two remaining dogs ran after her at the call of their names, “Flopsy! Mopsy!” And then she was out of the dining hall.

“Cut!” The director yelled. “Perfect, perfect! Excellent acting to all of you!”

Jennifer came back into the room with a large smile on her face. She was still cradling the dog in her arms, laughing lightly as it licked her face. “The only reason I agreed to be in this movie was because of the dogs, let’s be honest.”

Dan laughed along with her, nodding. “Completely understand.”

Putting the dog down, Jennifer straightened back up, brushing off her terrible dress. She squirmed a bit and made a nasty face. “Can’t wait to get out of this dress,” she said. Then she glanced up at Dan with an expectant grin on her face. “You doing anything after this? Wanna get some dinner?”

Dan found his vocal cords already answering without a second thought that this was fucking Jennifer Lawrence asking him to dinner. He just blurted it out, his tongue tangling out the words with no remorse or regrets. Literal word vomit, if you will. “Sorry, I already promised a friend I’d get dinner with them.”

And the fact that made it worse? It wasn’t even true in the slightest, just something he’d started to assume, to expect, after having Phil around for dinner almost every night for nearly three months. Tonight wasn’t planned, it never was, but his brain was already thinking of going to Phil’s shop after the shooting and walking him home and eating cheap takeout while playing Mario Kart.

He just turned Jennifer Lawrence down for a man who likes plants too much and some shitty carry out dinner.

Jennifer didn’t even look disappointed, just surprised. Dan almost wanted to take it back. Almost. “Wait, are you gay?” Her voice was low, but somehow Zoella still managed to hear it from where she was standing a few paces away.

“Oh my god, Jennifer, you can’t just ask people if they’re gay!” Zoella whisper-yelled. Dan had definitely walked into Mean Girls.

Dan flushed a bright shade of pink. He couldn’t believe he was having this conversation with the girl of his literal dreams. Why the fuck had he turned her down? “Um, no?” He squeaked. He cleared his throat before continuing. “I’ve just had plans with my friend tonight for a couple of weeks now and I’d hate to cancel on him.”

Zoella came to stand by them so she could listen in, gaping when he’d finished. “Is it Phil?”

“Phil?” Jennifer asked curiously. Her eyebrows furrowed and Dan wanted to bury himself in the carpet. “As in the florist guy we’ve been hearing about on television?”

“Long story,” Dan muttered. He really regretted saying anything and there was a vibration in his pocket that was rather distracting. “I smashed one of his plants when I fled away from the mobs and into his shop, so I gave him a plant to apologize. We recently started to hang out because we have a lot in common. He’s a friend, nothing more.” Dan took a breath, looking away from the girls’ expectant expressions. “And I’m not gay.”

Zoella’s expression softened and Jennifer put her hand on his shoulder. “Oh, honey,” Zoe said quietly.

Dan tried not to think about how her voice had dipped ever so slightly into a syrupy tone, sympathy oozing from the edges. He tried not to think about how Jennifer had squeezed his shoulder so softly, a small smile on her lips, one of understanding.

He also tried not to think about how blue Phil’s eyes were later that night or how the text message in his pocket asking if he was still up for dinner had made his insides turn to mush.

Dan Howell was not gay. He couldn’t be.

-

“Come to the Once Upon a Marigold premiere with me.”

From out of the corner of his eye, he saw Phil fumble with his watering can, nearly dropping it before recollecting himself. “Is that allowed?”

Dan nodded, biting his lip. The shop was closed but he was nervous to be seen still, despite the fact that he was literally considering taking Phil to a fucking premiere. “I can take a plus one. If you want to go, I mean.”

Finally turning to face Phil, he could fully see the faint pink blush on Phil’s pale cheeks and it gave him a small sense of satisfaction. Phil cleared his throat, tipping the watering can so it was lightly spraying into a pot of miniature roses. “I mean of course I want to go, but is that okay? Like with all of the speculation between us?”

Dan found himself nodding despite the way his brain was screaming at him, telling him that no it wasn’t okay. “It’d be an honour to have you there with me,” Dan said smoothly.

Phil agreed slowly, giving Dan a grin. He set the watering can down and wiped off his light green button-up. His eyes were glinting a beautiful aquamarine from the setting sun shining through the windows. Dan couldn’t help but think he was beautiful. “Then I’d love to go with you.” His gaze hardened a bit as he glanced down to Dan’s shoes, where he was standing in a mound of soil from where he’d spilled the bag accidentally. “Even if you do mess up my store.”

-

Dan could feel nausea building in his stomach along with the burn of bile in the back of his throat. The car was warm to the point where he was sweating, most likely soaking through his Alexander McQueen suit and the heat of Phil sitting next to him wasn’t particularly helping him cool down. Especially when he was wearing a tux with a bowtie decorated by little cacti.

Dan was definitely going to faint.

“Mr. Howell,” the driver said loudly. It was then that Dan realized they had stopped and a person was walking towards their limousine, about to open the door to the red carpet. “We’ve arrived.”

“Okay,” Dan mumbled dumbly. He paused his panicking at the feel of a warm hand sliding over where his was resting against the seat cushion and glanced over to find Phil holding his hand. They’d never held hands before in the entire year that they’d known each other, but Dan wasn’t opposed to it in the slightest. He was even surprised by how much he wanted the action to occur again.

Phil smiled widely at him, his teeth shining along with his entire face. He squeezed Dan’s hand before removing it and Dan couldn’t help but wish he hadn’t let go. Out of the corner of his eye, Dan saw the person put his hand on the door handle. “You’ll be okay. I’m here with you every step of the way,” Phil said gently. “When this is all over, we can go back to my house and I’ll watch Formula One with you for once after baking some giant brownies.”

There wasn’t enough time for Dan to say anything back so he just settled for a thankful smile, the limousine door opening with a wide swing. Immediately, screams met his ears, nearly bursting his eardrums with the intensity of it.

He will never understand why girls like to scream so much.

There was a moment where the crowd went silent, a deep intake of breath, and Dan could practically feel the moment when Phil got out of the limousine. Then the fans were screaming again, louder, and Dan saw a few people sobbing violently into their hands.

He glued a smile onto his face and began to walk, a little bit closer to Phil than necessary, but Phil didn’t seem to mind in the slightest. Dan stopped to shake some hands, ignoring the microphones shoved in his face, and signed a few autographs. Only when he reached the end of the carpet did he allow the reporters to ask some questions (albeit a bit invasive, as they always were).

“Dan, who did you bring with you today?”

A glance over at Phil told Dan that the florist was (somehow) completely relaxed with his hands in his pockets and a bright smile on his face. A ball of sunshine, just like always. “This is Phil,” he said. He didn’t care to elaborate.

Another mic was shoved into his face. It almost hit his nose and Dan tried not to seem annoyed. “How did you and Phil meet?”

Dan shrugged and tried to look nonchalant for the cameras despite the way he was internally flipping shit. This was a bad idea. Phil didn’t need all of the fame, he would have just been better with his little shop and plants without having to worry about the media shoving sexuality in his face. Hell, Dan didn’t even know Phil’s fucking sexuality. “I ran into his flower shop one day and knocked over one of his plants, resulting in a slightly hysterical Phil screaming at me and telling me I was a murderer.” He chuckled fondly at the memory, meeting Phil’s eyes and grinning across the bright flashes at him.

He pretended that he didn’t see the slight twitch of Phil’s hand towards him, the way Phil always did before he took Dan’s hand in his. He wished he could hold Phil’s hand right now. Just a few more questions and they could be away from the seeing eyes, away from the prying questions.

“Mr. Howell, what is your relationship with Phil?”

“Just friends,” Dan said firmly. “A close friend.”

“And you turned Jennifer Lawrence down for him?”

At that, Dan stiffened. Who had told them? It’d been months ago since that happened so why did it even matter anymore? Despite the raging question, he knew it would come out eventually, either from Dan himself or from Jennifer. But they didn’t need to know that tiny aspect. “I had dinner plans,” Dan managed to get out. He cleared his throat and excused himself from the cameras, walking inside of the building with Phil trailing behind him.

The thick walls of the theater immediately dulled the loud yelling of the fans. Dan relaxed, but only slightly.

A small touch on the his back alerted Dan to Phil’s presence beside him, a hand held gently to the small of his back. Even through Dan’s suit, he could still feel the heat resonating from Phil’s touch. “You okay?” Phil murmured softly. At Dan’s nod, he went on. His voice was humorous. “You turned down actual J-Law for me?”

Dan giggled and finally turned to look at him, gaze softening and finally relaxing. Just being near Phil made all of the stress flow out of him. “Don’t be so full of yourself. I only did it because I didn’t want to cancel our plans.”

“Plans? Oh you mean when you just show up at my doorstep unannounced and expect me to make you dinner? Those plans?”

Dan was full out laughing now, bumping his hip against Phil’s. “Shut up, you paperclip.”

“Paperclip?” Phil teased. His nose scrunched up with how widely he was smiling. “Have you run out of insults now?”

“Dan!”

Slightly annoyed at being interrupted, Dan turned to be greeted by a stunning Jennifer Lawrence in a slim golden dress. She was grinning widely and threw her arms around him in a tight hug. “It’s over! I can’t believe we’re actually done filming it!” She stepped back and swatted his shoulder jokingly. “Now I never have to see your face again! Alas!”

Dan pouted. “You’re just mad because half of the girls are here to see me and not you.”

“We all know who they’re really here for,” Jennifer said sarcastically, turning to Phil. She glanced over him, making a big show of doing so by pursing her lips and humming. Phil fidgeted uncomfortably under her gaze. “Not bad, Dan. He’s certainly fangirling material.”

Dan glared. “Just friends,” he emphasized. Ever since he had rejected her, Jennifer has been hinting a lot towards his sexuality and Dan was quite sick of it.

Phil cleared his throat. Bless him, Dan thought, because he was still grinning despite all of the secondhand embarrassment. “Right here, guys.”

Jennifer nodded, laughing and extending her hand. “Right, right. Sorry. I’m Jennifer. I’ve heard loads about you.”

“Not loads,” Dan muttered.

“Loads,” Jennifer confirmed.

Phil shook her hand, looking down at her warmly. He didn’t seem fazed in the slightest. Does he even know who he’s talking to? On second thought, he didn’t know who Dan even was in the first place. “It’s hard to believe that the actual Jennifer Lawrence knows who I am. I’m flattered, really. Should have brought along some roses to give you.”

There was a twinge in Dan’s gut but he pushed it away as Jennifer held a hand to her heart and cooed. “What a doll. I like him, Dan!” At Dan’s (unintentional) glare, she snickered, shooting him a pointed look. “Right, well we better get our seats. I heard this movie was okay.”

“‘Okay’,” Dan echoed, shaking his head. “Obviously it’s fantastic since I’m in it.”

Phil shrugged. “I’d never heard of you before you came into my shop, remember?” He teased.

Now it was Dan’s turn to put a hand on his heart, only this time in mock pain. “Ouch, painful.”

He heard Jennifer whisper, “GET REKT,” under her breath and he never wanted to metaphorically hit someone so hard before. Jennifer really was a giant meme.

As they all settled down into their assigned theatre seats, Dan felt something welling in his chest. Phil was talking animatedly beside him, a bright grin on his face and his hands gesturing wildly. He was explaining how excited he was to be finally getting a film adaption of his favourite book and how he was so much more excited that his best friend was the main character.

It was a good feeling, Dan decided, the feeling of a child on Christmas day looking at all of the presents under the tree, filled to the brim with utmost excitement. It was the first time he’d felt something this intense in a long time, especially while at a premiere. Usually he would just talk to those around him, smiling when he should, laughing when expected to. His plus one was always given to his mum because he could never find someone else important enough to bring along.

But this year, Phil was by his side and Dan could feel the happiness vibrating from his chest in waves. He reached out and grabbed Phil’s hand just as the lights dimmed and the movie began. Phil went silent, face a beautiful shade of crimson, and entwined their fingers together.

Dan could almost feel the eyes of his peers around him, staring at them, wondering about their relationship. He knew that wasn’t true though. Nobody was staring, nobody was picking them apart, and everybody was staring straight at the screen, watching as Edric the troll wandered through the forest and found a little boy in some bushes, starting the fairy tale. He could still feel them though, even if it was too dark to notice that Dan was holding hands with another guy.

Dan shook his head lightly. He wouldn’t think about that right now, he wouldn’t let them take this away from him. Phil’s hand was smooth and soft in his, thumb rubbing gently against the Dan’s skin. It was calming and Dan relaxed into the touch.

Even if Dan was slightly biased, he had to admit that the movie was absolutely amazing. It followed the book well and Dan seemed so lively in it. Halfway through, Dan felt a pressure against his shoulder and glanced down to see that Phil had rested his head there. They were still holding hands so the action seemed more intimate beside the fact that this had happened many times before.

Dan didn’t say anything because he really didn’t mind, and they didn’t move for the rest of the movie until the credits started rolling and a round of applause spiked through the air.

Phil turned to him and hugged him tight, weaving his arms around Dan’s neck to leave their chests pressed together. The armrest of the theatre chair was jammed into his stomach but he didn’t really care, nuzzling his nose into Phil’s neck and breathing in his familiar scent.

“Good job,” Phil whispered into his ear. His breath and tone of voice made shivers run down Dan’s spine. “This is one of the first movies where I finally saw your eyes light up. You seem happier and more at peace. I’m so proud of you, Dan.”

Dan smiled into Phil’s skin. He longed to just kiss him in the middle of the cheering crowd. He didn’t, instead pushing away those thoughts and answering Phil in a soft voice. “It’s all thanks to you,” Dan breathed.

When Phil pulled away, he had a large smile on his face and Dan knew he had been telling the truth. Even as people surrounded him, congratulating him, he felt warm. The voices felt like a dull buzz in his brain. And Phil was beside him, an anchor pulling Dan to Earth and keeping him sane, showing Dan how to accept himself and how to be happy.

Even if Dan didn’t believe in fate, he may have to just believe in it just this once.

-

“As you can see here, Dan Howell has decided to bring the rumoured florist, Phil Lester, to the Once Upon a Marigold premiere last week. Many are wondering if they are lying about being ‘just friends’, especially after turning down co-star Jennifer Lawrence for a dinner night with Phil. Although Dan Howell has never stated he was gay, he has also always avoided the question of his sexuality, leading many to believe-.”

Dan shut off the television with a shout, throwing the remote at the screen with a satisfying clunk. He was shaking, his palms perspiring with sweat, and he could feel the wind be knocked out of him as if he was shot.

His fingers found his phone with great difficulty, punching in the wrong password five times before finally getting in. The screen was a blur as he found Phil’s name and typed out his message. Thank God for autocorrect.

To: Phil

Can you come over?? Media makes me anxious :-(

It was only a matter of seconds before Phil was replying, a bunch of sad emojis followed by his message.

From: Phil

On my way! Bringing some maltesers to fill your heart (and stomach)

Dan was just glad that the distance between Phil’s shop and his flat was relatively small. Phil was there in a matter of minutes, letting himself in and settling down beside Dan, who was curled up in a ball on the couch.

They were silent for a moment, only broken with a crinkling noise as Phil slide a packet of maltesers into Dan’s lap. Dan almost wanted to laugh but his anxiety level was too high so he just shakily opened the packet and stuck one into his mouth.

“Wanna talk about it?” Phil asked. His voice was soft like velvet and he leaned into Dan as a form of comfort.

It took Dan a moment to conjure up the words, popping another candy into his mouth and chewing it slowly. His mind had cleared slightly to where he could form words, but his hands were still shaking and there was nausea running through his stomach. “I hate how the media always tries to butt in on my life,” he muttered lowly. He struggled to sit up slightly, stretching out his limbs so he could fall against Phil’s weight, resting his head on his best friend’s shoulder. “They keep throwing around these rumours and it’s making me want to puke. They’re calling me gay and saying we’re in a relationship and trying to pick out every aspect of my life. I have no privacy and I can’t be gay. Dan Howell can’t be.”

Phil was quiet for a moment, letting his words sink in. He slowly intertwined their fingers together, an action that became much more common since the movie premiere. “Well, why can’t he be? Why shouldn’t he be?” Phil asked. “So what if you’re gay or straight or bi or anything else? I’m sure thousands of people, especially ones in the LGBT+ community, would be inspired if a huge actor came out about his sexuality. Being gay isn’t a disease, you know.”

“I’m not gay,” Dan mumbled. He turned his head so he was muttering the words into the skin of Phil’s neck. “I’m bi. It just bothers me that they think they have the right to say shit about me when they don’t know it’s true or not. And besides, maybe I’m not ready to come out and it sickens me that they’re trying to force me into it.”

Phil let out a big breath through his nose. He squeezed Dan’s hand tightly and Dan didn’t think they could be more pressed together if they tried. “If you’re not ready, then it’s none of their business. You can’t let things like this get to you, Dan. It’s not healthy. All that matters is that you move at your own pace and that you do things that make you happy. When I went to the premiere with you, I saw a confident man on the screen with a long lost light in his eyes and colour to his skin. Something in you changed because you’re coming out of your shell and doing the things you want to do, things that make you undeniably happy. Why should you give something like that up?”

Dan sniffled and it was then that he realized he had been crying, fat tears rolling down his cheeks and dripping onto Phil’s neck. He didn’t think to be embarrassed when Phil pulled away from him and put his fingers under his chin so they were making eye contact. Phil’s eyes were that beautiful blue, but they looked sad. Dan didn’t want him to be sad because of him.

“Why are you crying, Dan?” Phil whispered. His face was so close that Dan could hardly breath. He noticed the little freckles littering his cheeks and the green and yellows in the depths of blue irises, the small hairs shaved from his chin.

God, Phil was beautiful.

Dan brushed away his tears with the back of his hand. He wasn’t shaking anymore, Phil always seemed to be the calming factor to his life. “You said I should do what makes me happy, right?”

Phil nodded, confused at Dan’s sudden change of subject.

He didn’t think when he did it. His heart was pounding erratically in his chest and his fingers came up to tangle in the small hairs on the nape of Phil’s neck. As he began to lean in, he saw Phil’s eyes go wide with shock before closing, giving him the confidence to push forward and connect their lips together.

It wasn’t like any of the staged kisses Dan had to do for his movies. Those were all numb and over practiced and expected. This one was soft, a little flame igniting inside of Dan as their lips moved together slowly.

Kissing Phil was like kissing a long-lost lover. Phil was holding onto Dan’s hips so gently as if he was afraid he’d disappear and Dan’s thumb was stroking along Phil’s jawline. Everything was soft, new, raw.

When they pulled away, Dan couldn’t breathe. He was certain his face was the colour of ripe tomatoes, but that was alright because Phil’s was too. When they made eye contact, they burst into giggles, leaning into each other and burying their faces into each other’s skin.

Yeah, Dan thought, grinning as Phil placed little kisses all over his face. I think I can finally be happy without limit or shame.

He was finally free.

-

The next time Dan went out, he brought Phil along with him to a fancy restaurant that made Dan’s wallet cringe in agony. He made sure to hold his hand extra tight and kiss his cheek as they walked down the street.

There were cameras and lights being shoved at them but Dan didn’t mind, and he knew Phil didn’t either. There were articles written about them, pictures of them kissing in magazines, and Dan would just smile when he saw them because he looked so happy in those pictures that even the articles would comment on it.

Phil wasn’t wrong when he said Dan would inspire many LGBT+ people. He got letters and tweets every day thanking him for the courage to finally come out to family and friends, and the hate he had gotten for his sexuality was something he could look past. For four days straight, #PhanIsReal was trending worldwide, and yeah, he’s happier than he’s ever been.

Even if his flat was covered to the brim with plants.


End file.
